


tap twice to say...

by yoonminoml (fanficloverme96)



Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: ??? - Freeform, Character Study, Fluff, M/M, One-Shot, Sleepy Cuddles, Tamasou, i think, this is just really domestic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-10-03 13:14:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17284733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanficloverme96/pseuds/yoonminoml
Summary: Sougo suffers from sleepless nights, but Tamaki is always just a door away.





	tap twice to say...

**Author's Note:**

> wow i fell into the tamasou hole long enough before i finally wrote a fic for them rIP. also i binge-listened to clannad's ost while writing this to get into full DOMESTIC MODE ON.

 

Sleep doesn’t come easy to Sougo. Not anymore.

 

He wonders if it’s stress, or his body is just wrongly re-wired following his work schedule rather than an actual healthy biological one, because he’s used to working late until 3 am these days. Sometimes, he doesn’t reach home until the sun is high up in the sky and everyone else has left.

 

He supposes it’s the price of fame - after Music of People, or more commonly known as MOP, the popularity of IDOLiSH7 and by extension, MEZZO’, skyrocketed more than ever before, and Sougo finds himself swamped with work after work. Opportunities and deals come in like a fast-flowing river, and Sougo, being the kind of person he is, can’t turn down a job, especially not the ones his company worked hard to obtain for him.

 

Tsumugi is apologetic, but Sougo honestly doesn’t mind. He likes being busy. Sure, it’s tiring, but he likes doing _something._ He likes being able to keep his mind off of things.

 

Sougo lies in his bed, staring at the ceiling. The clock on his bedside ticks away, and Sougo is positive that at least an hour has passed since he tried to go to sleep.

 

He sighs. He enjoys being busy, but now he wonders if his body is suffering from his own selfish desires. He is grateful that Tamaki gets much more leeway than he does - being underage has its benefits and one of them is a strictly-imposed curfew for entertainers. Tamaki still has a few more years left before he has to worry about appearing on a midnight show.

 

He glances at the clock.

 

9 a.m.

 

The sun is high up in the sky, per usual, and the dormitory is empty save for him and Yamato, who also got home late after a drama filming. The latter is already snoring away on the living room couch by the time Sougo got out from the shower, and he wishes sleep would come as easily to him as well. He closes his eyes, and wills his body to relax and hopefully, succumb to sleep.

 

But then he starts thinking about his 2 p.m. interview in a radio show with Riku for their upcoming cosmetic collaboration. The venue is quite a distance away so he has to wake up at least an hour early if he wants to make it in time.

 

There’s also a mini handshake event with Tamaki for MEZZO’ later in the evening, and Sougo has to remember to remind Tamaki not to be late. He’s been relying on Iori to do it, but the boy will be busy his own schedules around the same time so he can’t this time.

 

Ah but there’s also the segment on Re:Vale’s show at 8 p.m., so he has to figure out how to move locations quickly if --

 

“Ah, this is no use. I’m overthinking again,” Sougo murmurs. He covers his eyes with his hand and exhales loudly. Despite his attempts to relax, his body is thrumming with anticipation and energy. He’s tired to the bone, but he is too wired to sleep. His mind won’t stop thinking and worrying and stressing --

 

“Sou-chan?”

 

Tamaki?

 

“Sou-chan?” Tamaki’s disembodied voice drifts into Sougo’s room, slightly muffled by the door that separates them. A couple of knocks soon follow. “Are you up?”

 

“Tamaki-kun?” Sougo answers, sitting up on the mattress, “Why are you home? Don’t you have school?”

 

“There’s been some sort of weird bug affecting a lot of the teachers, so most classes got cancelled.” Sougo could hear the shrug in Tamaki’s tone. “Some barbeque went wrong or something, I don’t know. Iorin and I got sent home early.” There is a pause. “Can I come in? Talking outside the door like this is weird.”

 

“Ah! Um. Yes, please.”

 

The door knob twists before the door is pushed forward. Tamaki steps in, still dressed in his school uniform. He squints, trying to adjust to the lighting of the room.

 

“Sou-chan, your room is so dark. Like a cave,” Tamaki complains. He fumbles for the switch on the wall before pressing it, and instantly light fills the room. Sougo remains sitting on his bed, wincing slightly at the sudden onslaught of brightness.

 

Tamaki turns to him, and looks as if he just realized the state Sougo is in.

 

“Ah. Were you getting ready for bed?” he asks.

 

Sougo smiles. “I’ve been trying to sleep for the past hour,” he admits, “But it won’t come no matter what.” He pats the spot beside him. “Come sit, Tamaki-kun.”

 

Tamaki obeys, already moving towards him. Sougo holds out his hand by instinct, and Tamaki laces their fingers together as he sits on the bed, dipping the mattress lightly. Tamaki looks at their intertwined hands for a brief moment before turning to look at Sougo.

 

“Sorry if I bothered you,” he says ruefully. “I could leave if you wanna. Iorin would scold me if I don’t let you rest.”

 

Sougo shakes his head. “You’re never a bother, Tamaki-kun.”

 

Tamaki grins in response, clearly pleased by these words. Sougo feels warmth spread in his chest. Ah, this person. How easy it is for him to influence Sougo’s own emotions.

 

“That being said,” Sougo continues, sighing, “I haven’t been able to sleep lately anyway. I have a schedule in several hours so I could really use the rest but my body won’t listen.”

 

He leans against Tamaki’s shoulder; the boy’s presence is both warm and reassuring and Sougo often feels at ease just by being near him. He inhales - Tamaki smells like vanilla and a hint of spice. An odd combination that is comforting all the same.

 

Tamaki frowns. He uses his free hand to pat Sougo’s hair, before it slowly moves to press gently against Sougo’s forehead. Sougo moves to look at him in slight confusion.

 

“Tamaki-kun?”

 

“You don’t seem to have a fever,” says Tamaki, “Are you sick? Is that why you can’t sleep?”

 

Sougo smiles and shakes his head again. “I’m perfectly fine, Tamaki-kun. I’m just… “ He bites his bottom lip. “I guess I can’t seem to relax, that’s all.”

 

Tamaki is quiet for a moment.

 

“I just can’t stop worrying,” Sougo confesses softly, closing his eyes. His other hand moves to grip the front of Tamaki’s blazer, using the rough material underneath his fingers as some sort of anchor to keep him steady. He lets out a shaky breath. “Even though there’s really nothing to worry about. We’ve been so busy and it’s nobody’s fault but… I can’t seem to relax anymore because of it.”

 

There is a soft laugh.

 

“I’m pathetic, aren’t I, Tamaki-kun?” Sougo whispers. “It’s such a small problem but -,”

 

“Sou-chan, what did I tell you about this?” Tamaki interrupts, sounding a little exasperated. He tilts Sougo’s chin so he is facing him. Sougo opens his eyes, startled by the sudden movement, and by Tamaki’s serious expression. “No such thing as a small problem. And even if there is, doesn’t mean you should hold yourself back all the time.”

 

“But --,”

 

“If I can’t sleep, I’d be very grumpy, Sou-chan. I’d refuse to do any work until I get rest.”

 

“Tamaki-kun--!”

 

“But I know you won’t do that,” Tamaki continues meaningfully, “So the very least you can do is talk to someone about your problems. Not wait until it gets really bad.”  He pauses. “How long has this been going on?”

 

Sougo hesitates, averting his gaze,

 

“Sou-chan.”

 

“A few weeks,” Sougo admits quietly.

 

“ _Sou-chan_ .” There is clear exasperation in Tamaki’s tone that it fills Sougo with shame just hearing it. “You’ve been suffering for _that_ long?” Tamaki lets go of Sougo’s hand to run his fingers through his hair. Sougo is filled with a sudden sense of loss when Tamaki withdrew his hand, but instead of reaching out for it again, he curls his fingers and turns away.

 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Tamaki asks.

 

“Everyone else was busy so I didn’t want to be a bother,” Sougo murmurs.

 

“Sou-chan, you’re never a bother,” answers Tamaki seriously.

 

Hearing his previous words directed towards himself makes Sougo smile in spite of everything. “Tamaki-kun… Eh, Tamaki-kun?”

 

Tamaki has stood up and is currently walking towards the light switch by Sougo’s bedroom door. With a flick of his wrist, he switches the light off and Sougo’s room is instantly becomes dim once more. If it weren’t for the sunlight streaming through Sougo’s translucent curtains, his room would be enveloped in total darkness.

 

“Tamaki-kun, what are you…?”

 

“Making sure you get some sleep.” Tamaki’s tone is filled with determination.

 

Sougo watches in puzzlement when Tamaki approaches him again before sitting on the bed beside him. His eyebrows shoot up when Tamaki begins tucking himself in next to Sougo, drawing the blanket on up to his lap before leaning against the pillow. He squirms a little - Sougo’s bed is more than enough for a single person, perhaps two if it’s someone as small as Riku or Mitsuki, but with Tamaki’s structure and height, the pair barely fit on the bed.

 

“T-Tamaki-kun! W-what are you doing?” Sougo exclaims, cheeks flushing at the sudden closeness. His heart is beating wildly in his chest and he prays to every deity out there that Tamaki wouldn’t notice it in the quietness of his room.

 

“Move over, Sou-chan. I’m falling over,” Tamaki grumbles.

 

“I don’t recall ever inviting you to lie down here!” Sougo protests.

 

Tamaki raises one eyebrow. “Do you want me to leave?”

 

There is a sudden pause.

 

“I…” Sougo bites his bottom lip again and turns away, the flush on his cheeks deepening. In the dim light, his hand fumbles around until it lands on the material of Tamaki’s blazer sleeve. Slowly, with a slight tremble, his fingers close around the fabric and ever so slightly, he tugs. “I never said that.”

 

Tamaki laughs softly to himself and Sougo could almost hear the triumph in his voice. Ah, this person, Sougo thinks almost miserably, He knows how to get what he wants. His heart squeezes and he ducks his face, screwing his eyes shut. Sougo wills his heart to calm down.

 

“You should be more honest with yourself, Sou-chan,” Tamaki chides with no bite. “Come on.” He wraps one arm around Sougo’s shoulder, pulling him closer. “I got a lot of body heat so I can keep you warm!” He grins. “Rikkun once said I’ll be very useful during cold winters. Heh.”

 

In spite of everything, Sougo chuckles. He allows himself to be pulled closer, until he is pressed against Tamaki’s side. His vanilla and spice scent is stronger now, and if Sougo allows himself to, he could listen to the steady beat of Tamaki’s heartbeat.

 

Calm. Steady. Just like Tamaki’s existence.

 

“You just want an excuse to cuddle,” Sougo points out.

 

“Hm.” Tamaki leans forward, and Sougo’s heart skips a beat when he feels something nuzzling his hair. He feels an intake of breath and realizes belatedly that Tamaki is nuzzling his hair. If Sougo’s heartbeat was fast before, it is absolutely erratic now.

 

“Maybe?” Tamaki answers offhandedly, “You’re not very touchy, are you, Sou-chan?”

 

Sougo stills. His grip on Tamaki’s sleeve loosens. Carefully, he shakes his head.

 

“I don’t hate contact. I just…” Sougo sighs. “I’m not used to them.”

 

Growing up in the kind of household he did, how could he be? The only one who would openly show their affection to Sougo was his uncle, and he passed away long ago - long enough that Sougo could barely remember the warmth of his hand as he pats Sougo’s right cheek twice; his own special way of saying he loves him.

 

After his death, the Osaka household, which was already a distant family in the first place, grows even colder. If Sougo hadn’t left, he’d always wonder if he’d someday inherit the distant and faraway look his mother had, and the polite but cool one his father constantly wears.

 

Involuntarily, he shivers.

 

“Sou-chan?” Tamaki peers at him. “Sorry, are you cold? I’m hogging the blanket,  aren’t I?” He hurriedly tugs the blanket upwards until it covers Sougo’s chest.

 

“I’m not cold. I was just…” Sougo buries his face against Tamaki’s side. “I was just thinking. Too much. Again.”

 

He feels Tamaki shift, and soon, the boy is nuzzling his hair again, taking a deep inhale. Sougo hopes his hair doesn’t smell too bad. He did shampoo it yesterday.

 

“For now, don’t think about anything,” Tamaki says softly.

 

“I’ve been trying,” Sougo answers just as softly.

 

“Then… Ah. It’s loud.”

 

Sougo blinks. “What is?”

 

Tamaki hums a single note, as if wonder. “My heartbeat.”

 

“Eh?” Sougo listens carefully, furrowing his brows. If they are talking about heartbeats, then shouldn’t it be his that is loud? Though not as erratic as before, Sougo could feel the fast thrumming of his heart in his chest. It reminds him of a hummingbird’s wings, though thankfully not as fast.

 

“I don’t-,”

 

Then, he hears it. Pressing his ear closer to the spot where Tamaki’s heart lies in his chest, he could hear it. The familiar, steady heartbeat.

 

A chuckle escapes Sougo’s lips. “Ah. You’re right. Why is it, I wonder?”

 

There is silence and for a moment, Sougo wonders if Tamaki did not hear his question.

 

“Anyway,” Tamaki continues, and there is a strange hurriedness in his tone, “Focus on that. My heartbeat. Listen to it.”

 

Sougo blinks owlishly. “Tama-,”

 

“Enough talking and listen already!” Tamaki insists, sounding almost whiny even. “Don’t think about anything else and just focus on it.” He pauses. “Listen to it and... “ He holds Sougo closer. “And relax.”

 

Sougo closes his eyes. “Okay,” he relents.

 

The pair doesn’t talk after that. Sougo focuses on the sound of Tamaki’s steady heartbeat and tries to match his breathing with it. He doesn’t think - doesn’t allow himself to. He listens. And listens. And listens again.

 

Tamaki is about to nod off himself when he feels Sougo’s grip on his sleeve loosen before his fingers release the material completely. Sougo’s head against his shoulder is ducked and his breathing is slower now. Calmer.

 

“Tama...ki-kun?”

 

“Why are you still up?” Tamaki asks with a sigh.

  
“I just… remembered something. About my uncle.”

 

Tamaki waits.

 

“He used to….” Sougo’s words are beginning to slur. “Pat my...right cheek… twice.”

 

“Why?” Tamaki asks despite himself.

 

“His way of… saying… lo-”

 

“Sou-chan?”

 

He turns to peer at Sougo carefully.

 

Leaning against Tamaki’s shoulder with an expression smooth from worries, Sougo is asleep.

 

Tamaki pats Sougo’s hair affectionately. “Good night, Sou-chan. Rest well.”

 

*

*

*

*

*

 

Before Sougo fully slips into the realm of unconsciousness, he thinks he feels something warm pat his right cheek.

 

Once.

 

Twice.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are lovely and appreciated and i will gLOMP YOU WITH LOVE FOR THEM
> 
> also pls scream at me over on my [Twitter](twitter.com/tennssi0907) because it took me AGES to finally churn out my first Tamasou fic hhhhh


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